Dedicated to the Promotion and Preservation of American Muscle Cars, Dealer built Supercars and COPO cars. |
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#291
08-15-2017, 01:30 PM
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I was on vacation in Florida with some colleagues and their wives on Christmas vacation. I was walking down the beach and I see one of my colleagues approaching me. He is a psychologist. "You had breakfast yet," I ask?
"No." "Let's find a place." "Good," he says. "My car is right over there." I get in his car, a brand-new Lincoln, and right away I notice that it's a stick-shift. I say, "You bought a new Lincoln with a stick shift? I didn't know that they made a Lincoln like that." "They don't," he says. "I ordered it special." "I'll bet that cost a fortune," I reply. "Oh, yeah. You got that right." "Why would you buy a new Lincoln with a stick shift," I ask? He says, "My wife can't drive a stick." 
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#292
08-15-2017, 03:38 PM
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Quote:
__________________
You've never lived until you've almost died -- for those who fight for it, life has a flavor the protected will never know!
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#293
08-15-2017, 07:19 PM
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The Gynecologist
A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO paperwork and was just burned out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic. He went to the local technical college, signed up for classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could. When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill. When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying, "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade." The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark." After a pause, the instructor added, "I gave you an extra 50% because you did it all through the muffler, which I've never seen done in my entire career.
__________________
You've never lived until you've almost died -- for those who fight for it, life has a flavor the protected will never know!
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#295
08-19-2017, 04:17 PM
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Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner at his Grandmother’s house.
Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served. When Little Johnny received his plate, he started eating right away. “Johnny! Please wait until we say our prayer.” said his mother. “I don’t need to,” the boy replied. “Of course, you do.” his mother insisted. “We always say a prayer before eating at our house.” “That’s at our house.” Johnny explained. “But this is Grandma’s house, and she knows how to cook!”
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#296
08-19-2017, 04:21 PM
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Don't let Mama see this ... LOL
__________________
You've never lived until you've almost died -- for those who fight for it, life has a flavor the protected will never know!
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#297
08-23-2017, 06:07 PM
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#298
08-23-2017, 06:16 PM
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How true -- oh so true!!!
__________________
You've never lived until you've almost died -- for those who fight for it, life has a flavor the protected will never know!
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#299
08-23-2017, 06:17 PM
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#300
08-23-2017, 06:20 PM
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I've also seen the wing used as a pie rack ... LoL
__________________
You've never lived until you've almost died -- for those who fight for it, life has a flavor the protected will never know!
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